Are you emotionally mature?

Let’s be real. We all have unhealthiness being harbored inside our souls. We all have ways in which we react to certain situations. Some are positive, but many of our reactions are negative.

We have way to much baggage in our lives. Hurt that have never been worked through. Bitterness and unforgiveness that has haunted us for years. Needs that have gone unmet. We are a walking bag of messed up. The quicker we come to grips with this the quicker we can start to heal from it.

In my research and study time I wanted to determine some markers that differentiate between healthy and unhealthy emotions. The following is the fruit of that research. Some of the following is from the Psychological Society studies. Some of the following is my own experiences. All of the following has been prayed about and thought through from a Biblical world view.

Take a moment and read them then ask the tough questions. You will notice that in some situations you respond in very healthy way. You will also notice that in many other situations you can be very unhealthy.

The importance? The greater level of emotional unhealthiness I walk in the great the chances are that I will sabotage my relationships and my potential. Think about emotional healhy as a lid to a jar. If the lid is off you can fill it up until it overflows. If the lid is on it can never overflow. It will also never be able to be filled up with anything else as well.

Emotional unhealthiness is a lid that is put on your life. When we do not work through our emotional baggage. We put a lid on ourselves. The contents of our potential are stuck in the bottle. Plus, we can never truly receive anything new. The Bible tells me that I am suppose to be overflowing with blessing, love, and the such. A Lid prevents that. Time to remove the lid.

Mature Emotions: 

▪The intensity of mature emotions are appropriate to the situation. In everyday situations, it’s usually mild discomfort,        like a warning.

Mature emotions motivate us and give us energy for appropriate action, such as defending our boundaries and    integrity.

▪We usually have no problem expressing mature emotions . Those parts of us were able to mature because they could be recognized and expressed within our families. We might feel problems and tension, though, if our mature emotions  are mixed with unhealthy feelings and guilt. This is most common, since many people learn at an early age to feel guilty if they express their feelings sincerely.

Mature emotions  do not leave behind tension and discomfort left once the situation is resolved.

Mature emotions  allow us to perceive both sides of the story.

Mature emotions do not make us feel humiliated or bad about ourselves, nor do we feel a need to humiliate or hurt others.

Immature Emotions:

          ▪ Immature emotions are either overly intense or suppressed.

          ▪ Immature emotions are followed by an inner conflict, usually between guilt and shame on one side, and anger on the other, accompanied by unpleasant bodily sensations. This conflict can persist long after the unpleasant situation is over. Even if you are objectively right, such emotions can show you that there is a part of you that either is frightened or feels guilty. Some childish emotions can feel good temporarily, but the inner conflict remains.

         ▪ Immature emotions sap your energy and, if prolonged, result in stress and fatigue.

         ▪ Immature emotions convince you that you are primarily right, and the other person primarily wrong. (Sometimes it is the other way around, although that is more common with children or extremely abused people.)

         ▪ Immature emotions make you feel uncomfortable and doubt yourself, which may motivate you to criticize and find even more faults in other people.

After reading these I was able to pinpoint some of the immature (unhealthy) emotions in my own life. That alone is huge. Most people who are immature or unhealthy in their emotions tend to live in a false sense of reality. A reality created to help them cope with their emotions.  A reality that is based on their perceptions as seen through the eyes of their hurt and experiences.

It is not a question of right or wrong. It is a question or health or unhealthiness. If we desire to be healthy then we must dedicate ourselves to removing all that is unhealthy. Part of removing all that is unhealthy is taking an honest look at ourselves. That alone can be one of the most painful experiences. Taking an honest and objective look at ourselves is aboutcoming face to face with the possibility that we are really messed up people emotionally. Don’t be afraid though.  Coming face to face with the truth will ultimately lead to being the most  freeing experience of your life.

What is revealed can be confronted and healed. In other words, what I can see I can deal with. What I can deal with can be placed on a process towards health. Once placed on the process, journey toward health it is only a matter of time before I start becoming healthy. The goal is healthy. The mission is health.  Start the mission by confronting the ugly truth. The truth is we are messed up people needing to become healthy.

Jesus  took care of the SIN problem. The SIN problem is our proclivity to do things that  disobey and dishonor God. Through His death and resurrection we can have life. Also, Jesus set us on a path towards health. He is bringing our spirits back to a place to health. Now He wants to bring your souls, emotions, and minds to come to the same place of health. Start the journey! Push towards the prize! Complete the mission!

Take some time to pray and reflect through your emotional health. Allow God to speak to you. He will direct you to what needs to start to change. In this we can operate at high levels of emotional health.

Be Blessed!!

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